Prepping kids for your time away

Prepping kids for your time away 
Below are some ideas you could try to assist your kids when you are going to be travelling without them. Each summer, my spouse and I try to begin our vacation with a couple of days just the two of us and I have used the below strategies. They have also come in handy when we are all travelling as a family or if one of us is solo travelling and the other will be home with the kids. 

If you don’t do any of these, you can still be a kickass parent
In the parenting advice world, there are plenty of ideas on what to “do, do, do, do, do..” and it can become quite overwhelming. I know it can feel like there’s so much more we “should” be doing, changes we should make, etc, it’s endless. But the reality is we can not do it ALL, we just make choices along the way about what we will prioritize and what we will let go. So, these prep ideas may not be as important to you, to your kids wellbeing and if so, totally all good! Prepping for a trip is already enough, so only do what feels manageable and most important and ask for help along the way. 

Visual: Calendar
So this can be created in so many different ways and I encourage you to design it in whatever way works best for you as far as a paper calendar, a digital one you print or a construction paper one like I use. So I’ll just share how I have done it and you can adjust accordingly. I separate the construction paper into however many days the trip will be, drawing lines vertically with a Sharpie, with front and back if needed. Each day is labeled and then I glue pictures of who they will be with that day and if applicable, what they will be doing, ie. zoo trip. The last day includes pictures of my spouse and I, maybe our dogs, to show they will be home sweet home again with us. Sometimes I have included at the bottom, printed images of what mama and dada will be doing or pictures of coping ideas for what they can do if they miss us. I will then wrap it in packing tape as lamination, someday I will buy a laminator! I encourage them each night to cross a day off and I like to keep the calendars as memories. 

Visual: Love loops / Blocks 
Consider a visual that may make sense to your kids about “how many more days til the trip ends.” Daniel Tiger has a “love loops” idea where you cut construction paper into strips, then tape one into a circle, and connect the others, circle by circle. And each night you can rip one off which demonstrates they are one day closer. You could also consider putting blocks in a line on a bookshelf, one for each day, and take one down each night, this was an idea I heard from Dr. Becky once. 

Audio: BAB, yoto, button
You could also consider an audio support for your kids which includes your voice. This could be your recorded voice in a build a bear, a yoto player card or a recordable button from Amazon. You could read them one of their favorite stories, sing a couple songs, share things you love about them, tell a joke, call them their nicknames, make up a story, tell them you are so happy you get to be their parent and you can’t want to see them and hug, dance together,, play hide and seek, etc. 

Comfort and safety: Familiar Items
Sometimes we have sent our kids with one of our shirts so they would have our familiar smell near them in bed. One trip we packed a tiny bag for them to open every morning that had a familiar toy and book from home. We always invite them to help pack their suitcase with things they’d like to have for sleep or fun. If your kids are staying in your home, they will have access to all of those and you could consider making a scavenger hunt for particular items with notes. You can also give them a picture of you as a family, wrapped in packing tape for lamination, with “grownups always come back” written in sharpie on the back. 

Storytelling: Highlight ways they can cope with different feelings
Use toys to show the caregivers leaving and ways kids can cope when they miss their parents, feel sad, confused. Highlight for them who the helpers are, how they can ask for help and things that may feel comforting to them at that time. A hug, a call with you, drawing you a picture, a special toy snuggle, a walk outside, seeing a picture of you. 

Same vs. Different
Another idea I recall hearing from Dr. Becky is helping kids understand what will be the same and what will be different during the trip time. I have made a visual in the past on the back of one of the calendars for them to have that reminder. For example, snacks will be different, milk will be the same, sleep space will be different, blanket will be the same, house will be different, naptime will be the same. 

Trust in your kids resilience to be without you 
As much as you’re able, trust in your kids ability to be without you, even thrive without you and embody this as you say goodbye to them. Maybe come up with a special way you are going to greet one another when you see each other again!